An egg walks into a bar.
Bartender says, 'We don't serve breakfast.' The egg says, 'That's fine, I'm here for the hard stuff.'
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Egg Jokes
The yolk's on you. Our hand-curated collection of egg humor, served sunny-side up.
What's the difference between an egg and a bad investment?
The egg only ruins your morning.
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They say every egg is full of potential.
So was my gym membership.
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An omelette is just
a scrambled egg that got its life together.
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My therapist asked how I handle stress.
I said, 'Like an egg in boiling water — I go hard, then people peel me apart.'
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What did the egg say during its existential crisis?
'Am I the chicken's legacy or the chicken's replacement?'
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Hard-boiled eggs have seen some things.
Mostly the inside of a pot of boiling water. But still.
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An egg, a piece of toast, and a strip of bacon walk into a bar.
The bartender says, 'Sorry, we don't serve breakfast.' The bacon says, 'That's fine, I died for this.'
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Why did the egg break up with the frying pan?
The relationship was too one-sided and the egg always got burned.
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I asked my egg how it wanted to die.
It said, 'Quietly, in a soufflé — not screaming in a microwave.'
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The egg knew it wouldn't make it.
It was born to be broken. The only question was when.
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What's an egg's biggest fear?
Being told it has potential and then getting scrambled anyway.
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Showing page 1 of 2 — 23 jokes total